Incompetent Immigrant. A chat with a cousin that starts with “You won’t understand this” can go a long way. It’s possible that discouragement, rather than words of support, is the secret to achievement. I’m just ten years old, and I am in a new city, a new country, a new continent, and, most significantly, a new school, where the language is completely different from my native tongue. Everything seemed surreal and perplexing. I had no idea what to expect on the first day of fifth grade. I felt as if my memory had been erased, and I had to start over, but it was so much more difficult than learning to read and write in my mother language. I was given a stack of printed paper with permission forms and other information on the first day. I had put it in my purple folder and disregarded it because it was so foreign to me. It was all I could think of at the time. Ms. Lupo, an ESL teacher, approached me and handed me a list of random words to test my English level; out of all of them, the only word I believed I could pronounce was “girl,” which I mispronounced as “gril.” My vocabulary at the time consisted of only two words: “helov” and “Hava yu?” With a heavy accent. Later that day Ms. Lupo advised me that I needed to arrive one hour and a half early the next day for my ESL classes. For my ESL classes, I would arrive at school at 7:00 a.m. I was astounded by Ms. Lupo’s ability to teach ten foreign kids with an English level of zero, kids who faced similar challenges as me. In that class, I felt really connected, but I loathed my normal classes since no one, neither the teacher nor my peers, cared enough to inform the ESL students about what was going on. When everyone else got up, I got up and started reading body language. When we rose up to recite the pledge of allegiance at 8:30 a.m., I pretended to recite it with them by opening my mouth. I never got in front of the line when we formed one to go to lunch (or at least I thought we were going to lunch) because I was afraid of going to the incorrect place because, at the time, we used to go to graduation practice where we had to learn a song to sing in graduation. I had to do math on occasion. I used to assume that because I’d done math previously, arithmetic wouldn’t be as difficult as English, but it turns out that even simple math was strange to me. I felt like I couldn’t do anything at that time, not math or English. Every day, my hate for school becomes bigger than me. Crying in the morning had become a part of my morning routine, and my parents mistook it for a normal tantrum and sent me to school. Coming home and doing homework was more difficult than going to school because I could at least ask for help with my gibberish at school. Because I lived close to my cousins, and they spoke English and were older than me, I chose to seek their assistance when I needed it. They were my final resort for assistance because I always felt like I irritated them. I used to urge them to explain what I needed to do for homework, but they would get upset and push me away or claim that even if they explained it to me, I would not understand it. They made me feel insignificant and stupid, as if I would never learn English. Because I was an immigrant, I felt out of place at school, and I began to feel the same way at family events. In a room full of immigrants who thought highly of themselves, I felt like an incompetent immigrant. It was bad that I was surrounded by a toxic community, but it was also the reason I began to push myself to work harder in order to prove them wrong. I began to read novels, mispronouncing the words and being unable to comprehend what I was reading. In my ESL class, I was one of the most active students. I was named Student of the Month for April, and it was one of my proudest achievements at the time. I began viewing English films and television shows with subtitles, and I began translating them as I watched. In eight months, I was forming phrases and making small talk, and my accent was improving as I learned. I finished fifth grade and enrolled in an afterschool program in sixth grade, where I completed all of my schoolwork and assignments. I’m grateful for the encouragement I received from everyone around me. To this day, I learn more about my writing, reading, and English. I see my experience as a huge part of me and what helps me motivate myself. If a ten-year-old girl could do it, so could I. My parents were always there for me, even when no one else was. Today, I am the first-generation female in my family to attend college and pursue a profession in medicine. I’m a proud immigrant today, the same immigrant who detested being inept.

Literacy Narrative Self-Assessment

1. I believe I have engaged in the first-course learning outcome because of my literacy
   narrative essay has the characteristics of a memoir because it is about an event that
   occurred in my life and had a significant impact on my literary work and writing. In the
   literacy narrative, I organize the major events and thoroughly analyze them. But I feel like I
   need to work a little on the first-course learning outcome in order for me to satisfy it.
2. I believe I engaged in the second course learning outcome, having my literacy narrative
   essay read to me for me to understand my mistakes and fix them. For drafting, I had a
   completed draft to receive feedback from my peers, based on the feedback I revised my
   essay and checked for punctuation and grammar errors. I believe I have satisfied second
   course learning outcome.